Human detox

I have been speaking to a few people who are losing their minds with negative, toxic people in their lives. And I am starting to understand why this is a pattern in certain people's lives... including mine.

You're a pushover.

You work and you work to please everyone around you with no consideration for what you need or want out of the situation and end up being the bad person. Being this person, this pushover and "yes" man attracts abusive people into your life. People who unintentionally take advantage of your good nature. They don't mean to, they just think it's awesome that they found someone who meets their needs.

But sooner or later, friend, that shit's going to kill you.

It's called boundaries. Boundaries are what "normal" people use to differentiate their personal space with others'. Before setting out on any relationship they clearly indicate where their limits are. They say things like, "Okay, I'll do that but unfortunately I can't do that other thing at all". Apparently that's normal behaviour. Well, I did't get the memo. I didn't even get the SMS.

If you're like me you learnt to give of yourself because that's what good Christian people do (or whatever your reasoning has been) and that's how you succeed in life. Sure, it'll bring you a certain level of success in certain spheres, but at the expense of your soul - your health, your family and eventually, probably your finances as well.

I reach this space every so often, where I realise I overextended myself in the quest to please people. It's not their fault... it's mine. And the conclusion is: "Get your F-ing shit together, Adin". Lol. But I don't generally swear and I'm a people pleaser so it'll be more like, "Er... excuse me... erm... Self... would you mind setting boundaries, because it's putting me in a spot of bother".